to feel not enough

To feel as if you’re not enough—or not good enough—insufficiency is a war, not a battle.  Once in a while we are given a little break, a chance to be our true selves and to feel useful-but it seems those times are few and far between.

We are sick, weak, longing for comfort, we cannot relate to those around us, we are never satisfied, or we feel that those around us do not quite approve.  But [sometimes far worse], we are not meeting expectations we have set for ourselves—the web of lies is spun by a fierce, yet untalented liar.  Webs are strong—for flies—but they are not strong enough to hold the human heart captive.  Only the love that comes from God can hold us.

Although the web of lies cannot overtake us, it smears in our faces and confuses us—we are lost and left searching.

Sometimes we need to take a break and regenerate, but it is hard to get away from the day; do we stay up late or rise early?  Are we struggling to build relationships with those around us-with those we mean to serve, are we struggling to find you? 

It is a struggle, and sometimes we wonder if you would frown on us for trying to love others too much—could it be that we may grow to love you through loving other people?

Where we are today—do not leave us here—take us deeper, further in.  Where we are frustrated, please give grace, only enough to cover us completely.

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